Going Private?

I haven’t posted anything in a long time, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t been writing. I have a pretty impressive list of unpublished drafts hidden away. The reason I haven’t hit “publish” on any of them is that there have been a lot of really insane developments in my life lately, and I’ve been doing some soul searching about how comfortable I am broadcasting them into the universe. No one is more shocked about this than I am, as I used to live for the validation that came from having people like my ridiculous ramblings and post comments about them. I think, just at a basic level, these developments are so huge and personal and so very deeply mine that it’s strange to imagine opening them up for discussion with (and perhaps even judgment from) a wide audience I can’t control.

On the other hand, I do so desperately want to keep a record of this time and I would like to have the silly (and sometimes profound) feedback I used to get from the people who read this online piece of self-serving nonsense.

I’ve kept a lot of blogs in my Millennial life and I have never in all those incarnations begged readers or followers for comments. I’ve never shamed people who loved to lurk into becoming participants, and I’m not going to do that now. However, I would like, just this one time, to ask that if you read this (or used to read this, back when it was interesting), and if you want to continue to read this, that you let me know, only because I don’t want to devastate huge swaths of the internet by making this blog private.

Additionally, I’d feel really guilty for shutting down a blog that provides Googlers of the world with search term goldmines like “worst looking girl” or “yo betta shut yo ass up.”

Basically, do I stay or do I go?

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12 thoughts on “Going Private?

  1. I started following your blog shortly after your big move and I found it so inspiring! I forget now how I came across it but I absolutely enjoy reading when you post. I find it touching and funny. Reading your posts has allowed me to see/realize certain things in my life. I think sharing your journey is a wonderful and courageous thing, but I can definitely understand a need for privacy. I don’t think I’ve ever commented as I felt awkward admitting to reading about a stranger’s life haha but I wanted to let you know that I have missed your posts lately. Perhaps you can continue the public blog but start a personal, private one for yourself as well, for moments that you want to record but not necessarily share.

    Side note: if you’re interested to know how far your audience is spread, I’m located in Canada 🙂

  2. I am going through something similar, but I think I am veering towards “private” myself. That being said – I like reading your blog – I liked it since I first found it a year ago and read when I can to catch up. You have a good writing voice – so even if you take it private, please continue to develop it 🙂 Thanks!

  3. I’d love to continue to read your life journey. Every one has one and everyone has got something to say about how you got there, good or bad. I’d say stay, but if you want to be private about it, that’s totally your call. I support either decision!

    Be well!

  4. I love your blog, and would love to read your continued adventures, but only if you’re comfortable sharing, of course!

    Wishing you all good things. 🙂

  5. I’d like you to stay! You don’t know me at all, but I read your blog and enjoy reading about your honest choices and interesting life. I understand the privacy thing; I’m a blogger and a poet who publishes a lot of personal stuff. It can be tough, as you do open yourself up to criticism, but I think it’s par for the course if you want to be a writer. I’m very intrigued by this post and hope you’ll be posting a follow-up.

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