Spring Broken.

I just received the following text from Fertile Myrtle:



No, no, dear readers, I did not die.  I’ve just been sickly and introspective, and, in a bizarre turn of events, I was no longer convinced that I’m so super hilarious that the internet needs to hear from me every day.  However, it’s obvious post-frantic-text that my public needs me, so here’s what I’ve been up to lately:

On Monday morning, I woke up with a sore throat and a low-grade fever, and have continued to feel achy and swollen and miserable until right now, when I am finally feeling less disgusting.  So instead of going to hang out with the Fiece or going to lunch with a friend or heading to Newport Beach today, I have been taking long baths, reading a bunch of shitty magazines, wearing my favorite velour robe, and eating a ton of total crap while laying around on the couch.  Essentially, my Spring Break is shaping up to be just like this.  Except with more partying.  (And probably less James Franco.)

photo 1

I shared some leftover potato kugel with some animals, as you do.

photo 3

I burned off my wart!

photo 5

Peeps are disgusting. I ate them all.

In other news, nothing is going on here and no one cares.


16 thoughts on “Spring Broken.

  1. What’s with lady bloggers and cats? Is it a prerequisite or something? Sorry to hear you feel like crap, especially if you’re on break! That sucks! I’m positive that cramming a couple of boxes of peeps down your throat will have you well in no time though!

  2. Good thing your spring break is two weeks long and that Fiece #2 isn’t expected to make her debut just yet. Cuz your life needs to fit into my schedule. After all, if you are claiming naming rights then I get to claim your non-work hours.

    • That’s true. I have already decided I’m not going anywhere far away next week – I was toying with the idea of a road trip to the Grand Canyon – because I want to be close enough to come watch the beast. You are not the only one concerned about making my life fit your schedule. 🙂

    • The Peeps have worked wonders – I ate a horrific amount of them yesterday and am already feeling much better.

      I’m impressed with how put together your posts always are. I usually sit down and write mine in around twenty minutes and then publish them immediately because I have no patience.

      Your public needs you too!


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